torn btwn: "how can you let go of something so beautiful?" or "kleptomania: a condition money can buy.."

as you see from my choices for title, you realise that its hard for me to pick a title.. but if you've read my blog long enough, my titles don't usually add any value, or have any significance to the content of my post.. they're just random titles to unmatched entries.. i guess i've to go to primary school all over again to know the significance of titles..

actually, i do want to talk about or relate my entry to the title.. haha.. that's a first.. i'll not talk about the first one, but i just wanna repeat the first title to myself again.. ok, done..

serious man! kleptomaniacs is just a synonym for a rich theif.. impulse to steal, my ass.. if the idea of "right and wrong" is inherent in a person, there'd not even be a condition called kleptomania.. and if the person does not have that inherent idea in oneself, the person should be punished.. i think ignorance is a better excuse than kleptomania..

i just realise how stupid you are when you say, "the idiosyncrasies of life." doesn't that encapsulate everything that's weird and peculiar in life.. why does the english language have so many synonyms?? perhaps that's its beauty.. stolen words from various languages and chucked into the "rojak" called english.. english rojak anyone.. idiosyncrasy.. haha..

was going through some photos and i've realised what i actually want.. i want a room, with light-brown, "faded wood" kinda brown, walls, wooden floors (my floor now kinda wood.. haha..), brown, not built in cupboards, small drawers on rollers which i can move around and use as a temporary seat, a low bed frame with space under the bed, a computer chair that doesn't roll around, but more like a real chair.. i like the aged look of some people's bedroom.. not exactly the old look, but vintage and contemporary... i just realised the irony of that statement.. but all i want is my own room.. i think i wanna clearout my third bedroom and make it mine.. currently i'm sharing it with my brother.. i'll do it next year.. once i get my laptop, i'll make that room mine.. but i hate those built in cupboards.. maybe, i'll paint them brown or like those aged effects paint.. extreme makeover: bedroom edition, the end of this year.. haha.. only difference, i'll be the contractor and i'll shock myself with the result.. haha..

in search of inspiration; i found laughter, my favourite superhero, an imaginary accident & the imagination of somone being more than a friend..

what is loyalty when the owners of the club you support all this while let it slide to the position, let me add, the AWFUL position, it is in?? loyalty is equivalent to nothing..

let me say what i mean.. i'm a Leeds fan.. i wouldn't say hardcore.. but i've supported them when they were in debt, when they had to sell viduka, woodgate, kewell, boyer, and the saddest, Alan Smith... i supported them when they were relegated to the Championship.. of course there were good times, UEFA and stuff.. but their relegation this season was the last thing was able to handle.. yes they fought hard.. third last, but still relegated.. but administration.. that's sad.. 10 point deduction cause of one guy's and the board's folly around a decade ago.. i bet my loyalty..

i found another team with the hard playing style i like.. a team which looked like leeds before their downfall.. i'm now a blackburn fan.. you think i'm like a fucker who changes support just like that, but put yourself in my shoes.. two seasons in Europe before leeds fell to 14th and then to the Championship.. and now League 1..

Leeds for Blackburn.. hopefully blackburn qualifies for UEFA next season!! long live Mark Hughes and Blackburn..

with that, i'll move on to what i want..
first, this Lonsdale Blackburn jersey..
second this Adidas predator.. its not as if i'm going for a fucking expensive shoe or something.. i used basic Puma boots previously, and a broken hand-me-down pair of Adidas before that.. this pair is long overdue.. maybe next month.. this would set you back $245 if you buy it for me.. haha..

i don't think that you should have done what you did, whatever your reason, whoever you did it to..

sometimes, you think of what people did and you try, cracking your mind in the process, to find a reason why they did it, and you think to yourself, "why the heck did they actually do it?" sometimes people don't make sense.. sometimes i don't make sense.. i guess the only one who TRULY understands is th person making the decision him/herself.. just cause i'm a friend, don't think i'll back your decisions.. i'm fiercely protective of my opinions and if i don't think that you should have done what you did, i'll tell it right to your face.. even if you're a friend.. a true friend is one who tells you that you have greens stuck in your teeth, is one who tells you that you're face is getting more pimply and you should do something about it, is one who tells you that the way you style your is ugly, you get my gist.. i'll be a true friend..

that aside, though most readers would not get what the freaking fuck i'm talking about, i wanna say something.. i hate pop-ups.. ok that's random cause a pop-up actually popped up, but back to what i wanna say today.. what did i wanna say??

oh ya.. today was the worst day of work ever.. i was flooded with work and it doesn't help that i have had to "split myself into two" and balance that with dry-runs of the competition which i'm involved in..(i was chosen as emcee.... don't laugh..) but it helped that i found inspiration and actually pulled thru the dry-runs.. haha.. sometimes, thinking about occasions with different people gets you outta stress, and taking the persona of someone else really helps.. heh... somehow, presenting and getting ready made my day.. but the day of reckoning would be tmr.. haha.. wish me all the best!!(i don't believe in luck, though it struck me a few times this month...)

i will volunteer... i will involve myself in anything that promotes me.. i will get at least a silver for IPPT.. i will achieve my outstanding grade for ns.. i will continue my "alternate day" running routines around my neighbourhood.. i'll keep myself fit.. i'll maintain my BMI.. i will not let myself slip into a downward spiral of laziness and "unfit-ness".. i will not use my work as an excuse not to exercise.. i will not ask my parents for money unless i really need it.. i will help my mom clean up the house this Saturday, as i don't believe that work is a valid excuse to neglect this place i call home.. i will save more money.. i will make sure i keep the 100 my friend owes me in my money box.. i will find inspiration to take ns day-by-day till i ORD.. i will make sure i'll strive to achieve all my targets.. i will catch the movies i wanna catch, whoever its with, even if i must watch it alone.. i will spend more time with Asyraf, whom i've not seen for a long time.. i will spend more time with my cousins as they have reached "going-out" age, and i don't want them to mix witht the wrong people.. i will take note of their birthdays too.. i will be less fiercely protective of my opinions.. i will argue mush and listen more..

all this God-willing..

not pissed drunk, just bored and not knowing what to do, but just letting my brain cells rot away.

hey guys.. pls watch this video.. i've been feeling emo lately..

sometimes listening to this song, makes me wish that my girl's name is delilah.. but, not that i can sing anyways, so ya... haha..